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Bigger, Stronger, Wiser, Kind is Always a Choice

a girl pouting at the grocery store as her mother tells her to put the candy bar back on the shelf


was out shopping the other day when I passed a young mother with her preschool aged daughter. They were arguing. The little girl wanted her mom to buy a toy, and her mom was telling her to put it back on the shelf. The girl started to tantrum. The mom told her daughter to stop screaming and to go sit on the bench and take a time out.

At this point, her daughter screamed louder and started kicking at the wheel on the cart. I could see the tension on the mom’s face, and watched as she physically tried to move her daughter to the chair – it was a struggle. But then, it was like she caught her Shark Music. Instead of a power struggle over sitting in the chair, the mom sat down next to her and pulled her daughter closer and held her in her arms. It was as though they were taking the time out together – a time in! And there they sat, arm in arm, until things got better. And it hardly took any time at all. Pretty soon, her daughter rubbed her eyes and said she was ok. The toy went back on the shelf, and off they went.

Shark Music can make it difficult to see clearly, especially in the heat of the moment. It’s so helpful when we remember during those difficult times that Bigger, Stronger, Wiser, Kind is always a choice.

I invite you to share with me your comments, reflections, Circle stories and experiences with Circle of Security Parenting. Your submissions may be used in future blog posts, with all identifying information excluded, unless you specifically request to be identified. Contact me at brooke[at]circleofsecurityinternational[dot]com.